Update On Joanne

Hey DQ’s,

I have read the blog daily for the past month or so. Even when there is nothing new posted, I end up reading it from the top to the bottom all over again. Everyone has expressed themselves so beautifully, so eloquently. It is sad to see this meeting place for your FRIAMILY come to an end . We understand the need for you to move on.

I worked with Joanne for a few years up in Georgetown, and was Darcy’s Grade 2 teacher. Although our paths had separated, I thought about her often.

I had the opportunity to watch the documentary today. (My 11 month son old decided to have a 2 hour nap just then, so I was able to watch it uninterrupted!) I had a “good cry” as Joanne would have put it! The documentary reaffirmed what I already knew about Joanne. She was an amazing, strong and beautiful woman. She is an inspiration to us all. Although she is gone from us here, she is still doing her work from “up there”. I now take the time to enjoy the little things. I cherish each day with my husband and son. I make more time to visit with my family and friends.

Thank you for allowing us to share in your most personal thoughts and memories through this site. You are a very special family. I have ordered my own personal copy of the documentary. It something I will keep dear to me and it will help me to remember fondly what a wonderful woman, teacher, wife and mother Joanne was.

My thoughts and prayers are with you,
Angela D’Alonzo

2
Attached are a couple of pics. We took yesterday at the CIBC Run for the Cure event. We all ran/walked/crawled our way to the finish line of the 5k event. A wonderfully organized event, attended by close to 30,000 people! Amazing day!

I was told by Karen (She and Les and Sherriand Mimi walked) that they had a couple of people speak to them about Joanne ... that they saw the shirts, and wanted to say hi! Amazing to know that we had a very special Angel watching over us! We are already planning next years "Team Daquano." Any and all willing participants can join!

Hope all is well Wuddy!
2 fer now!

This was us today. I thought of Joanne the whole time - it was a sad walk for me but when Kirsten told me that we should do this everyday so that we could raise even more money so that people would never had breast cancer I knew it was worth it!!

Thinking of all of you ...
Lots of love,
Ann

I thought I had prepared myself for Joanne's passing, but I am finding that you can never be fully prepared for losing someone you love. I bought myself a breast cancer angel pin that I wear everyday for Joanne, somehow it comforts me. I never really thought that this awful disease would get the better of Joanne, I really believed that she would beat this, just as she did before. You hear stories of people dying everyday, but until it touches you, you can't truly understand the sadness and emptiness that you feel after losing a loved one.

I think about Joanne everyday, and cherish the time we spent together, and the special relationship we had. Right now, I find that those memories of her fill me with such sadness and an aching that just doesn't want to go away. I miss her so much, I find myself crying at the silliest things, and then I can't stop. I am tired of applying hemorrhoid cream as a part of my daily make-up routine, to reduce puffiness!! I wish that I could be with her wherever she is, that is the hardest part. I know in time, the pain will ease and I will be able to remember Joanne with happiness instead of sorrow. This blog has been a huge help for me through it all, and I know all of you who read this know how I am feeling, so I am not alone.

I spent the day with Mike, and the kids were out and about, they are all doing fine and I think it is in part to this wonderful, supportive, framily that surrounds them. What I like best is that when I see the kids, I see Joanne. I think someone wrote in this blog that they wouldn't trade the pain they feel now, for not having known or being close to a loved one. I am happy and thankful for the friendship we shared. I will love you Joanne, forever and always.
May you rest in peace, your beautiful family is in good hands.
Take care Daquano family,

I love ya!
Martha Quinn

Thru this blog, we were given permission, to enter the private world, of the Daquano/ d'Entremont family. We felt heartache, tears, compassion and most importantly overwhelming support and caring, for a FANTASTIC woman named Joanne.

To me. Auntie Lel, she was sunshine, laughter and awesome amounts of love. I will miss Joanne's great smile and her "HI! Auntie Lel". She was a delight to be around and I think of her everyday, with a fairly 'clean driveway'.

Thank you to the Blogger "Ted". You were able to put all the words and innermost feelings of the "Friamily" on this blog and I know at times it was very difficult. I hope that this connection with you and the love you shared, will remain with the Crokam clan forever.

I have a quote;

"Each soul leaves a legacy of love ...
Each memory a bridge to comfort & connect one heart to another forever."

Live, love, laugh
Leslie Crokam (Auntie Lel)

Hi all,
Here's something that my colleague, Marie, who recently lost her 7-year-old daughter, sent me.
Love,
Jeannine

WHEN YOU ARE BEREAVED, IT IS ALRIGHT TO ...

Scream in the shower; yell in the car;
Howl at the moon; cry anywhere you like;
Misplace your glasses; lose the car;
Forget your own name;
Put milk in the cupboard, toilet paper in the refrigerator and ice cream in the oven;
Beat up a pillow; stomp on the ground;
Throw stones in a lake; change grocery stores if it hurts;
Wear one black shoe and one navy; have tear stains on your tie;
Eat French fries for breakfast, toast for lunch and peanut butter for dinner (as long as you can eat);
Write her a letter or bake her a cake.
Celebrate her life on her birthday;
Talk to your pets (they understand);
Leave her room the way it is for as long as you like;
Say her name just to hear the sound;
Talk about her to others. Tell loved ones what you need;
Say no when you feel like it; cancel plans if you want,
and Have a bad day.

AND ONE DAY WHEN YOU'RE READY, IT'S ALRIGHT TO ...

Laugh again; Dance and feel good;
Have a good time;
Look forward to tomorrow
Sing in the shower;
Smile at a friend's mum;
Wear make-up once more;
Go for a day, a week - and even a month without crying;
Celebrate the holidays;
Forgive those who failed you;
Learn something new;
Look at her pictures and remember with happiness, no pain;
Go on with your life;
And cherish the memories.
And one day when it's time,
it's all right to love again.

- Vicki Tushingham

Hello

I have worn two hats during the life of this thing we have come to call The Blog. The first as Ted or Poppa, a member of the immediate family. The second as the guy you had to send your stuff to if you wanted to get it blogged. (and who got an email, from the Blog software, for every single comment that was made) Both hats were heavy. I saw, read and experienced it all.
What a ride!

As others have done and will do at this time, I wish to summarize. However, right now my mind is swirling with a myriad of thoughts, and my heart is so full of sadness, love and at the same time the joy of hope, that I find it impossible to encapsulate all that in just a few words.

I don't think I could say it better than it has already been said. My daughter Kimberley posted a comment the other day that I think says it all for me, and perhaps, for most. All we need to do is change a word or two. With her permission ...

The blog became something bigger and something more important than anyone ever intended it to be. It made us weep. It made us laugh. It made us addicted!

We all shared in something touching, personal and wonderful. The blog created a bigger sense of self, of community, of FRIAMILY that snowballed with love, with sorrow, with grief and in mourning. It swirls now in peace and in hope on our way to joy.

I thank everyone for allowing this blog to become something bigger than itself. Thank you Mike and Joanne for allowing me to take this most difficult and emotional journey along side you.

Thank you Joanne for being my "sister", being my friend and teaching me to just put one foot in front of the other.

LIVE
LOVE
LAUGH

Kim


Thank you Kimie.

My good-thoughts go out to you all.

Ted, Poppa, The Blogger

Sadly, this Blog is coming to an end. It has been a place of comfort and reflection for the endless members of the Friamily. The Blog has been many things for many people. It gave us laughter, ... (Objects in the Mirror may appear) ... It gave us tears, ... The beautiful, heartfelt words from Mike, ... and the touching poem by Joanne's Mom Kay ... But, most of all, ... it gave us Joannne. We were able to come to this place and share with so many, our feelings about this incredible woman, ... as I do now. Joanne meant more to me than anyone will ever realize ... Words are difficult to find ... Tears are not ... I loved her and miss her daily. Dan's heart is sore, ... but his lifetime of memories of family and his sister will help him through ... It's day to day ... he loved her. Our kids, ... well they just miss their "Auntie Jo"... Ryan has Jo's picture on the dash of his car for all to see ... he loved her. Caitlyn is proud that Auntie Jo was her godmother too and is searching for just the right picture of Jo to adorn that empty spot on her bedroom wall ... she loved her. Meaghan changed the screen saver on her cell phone from her favorite band to a beautiful picture of Auntie Jo ... (wow) ... she loved her. We will all find peace in our own ways. We will always be there for Mike, Dylan, Dean and Darcy ... always! We love you and are but a word away. It has been wonderful to be linked to all the caring, loving, members of the Friamily and we wish all of you love, peace and happiness always!
Thank you for everything.
Linda, Dan, Ryan, Caitlyn, and Meaghan d'Entremont.

I can only echo the sentiments of Bev in thanking all the wonderful people whose lives Joanne touched in so many ways. Your outpouring of love on the blog and in the many ways you supported Joanne, Mike and my three beautiful grandchildren has left an impression that can never be erased.
A great man once said "If everyone lit just one little candle, what a great world this would be."
Thank you all for lighting your candle for the Daquano / d'Entremont friamily.
Love IS the tie that binds.
Until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of his hand.

This blog will be open to entries and comments for one more week.

Until Midnight Thursday October 5, 2006.

After that, it will remain on-line and be able to be viewed for some time.

However, no further updates will be made nor comments allowed after the above date.

Now that this Blog is coming to an end it is time for giving heartfelt thanks to all the wonderful, amazing people who make up the Friamily. It was the most beautiful outpouring of love, support and affection that I have ever witnessed, both during Joanne's stay in the hospital and then after her passing for the rest of that week, and it continues.

Thank you all for your love, support and Blog comments to Mike, Dylan, Dean & Darcy and to both the Daquano and d'Entremont families. It is a comfort to know that Mike and the kids will have this Friamily not only during their transition to "eight legs", but forever.

During the Blog's life I couldn't seem to put words to paper in the beautiful way others were doing. But I could walk, 60K in fact, this year at the Weekend to End Breast Cancer (W2EBC) in honour of Joanne. This will be the first of many walks unless a cure is found. Next year, I and many others will walk in Joanne's memory and we'll know that her spirit will be there with us all the way.

The W2EBC is the charity of choice for the Benefit Night at the Georgetown Little Theatre November 9th. Joanne's brother Paul will be a member of the cast for this production. If you would like tickets to see this fine production please email me at bevdaquano@sympatico.ca

I will miss Joanne forever, she was more than just a perfect daughter-in-law, she was a daughter and a friend and I loved her dearly.

Thank you all for being so special
Bev / Gramma Bev

We're back.
Safe and sound.
We arrived at 12:30 p.m. on Monday Sept 25. The first day of the rest of our lives.
On all eight feet.

Before we opened the door to the van and got out, I told my three precious children that they are the only three things on this earth that truly belong to me. I have to share them, and it will be hard. I will make mistakes, but I am going to be the best Dad I can be. I told them once again how proud I was of them, and told them for the gazillionth time how much I love them. (Can you ever really say it enough?)

Once we had unpacked and put dirty clothes where they are supposed to be, I had an opportunity to catch up on some mail. Not ten minutes into this exercise did Darcy come downstairs and announce that she would like to shave her legs and could she please use Dylan's razor. Thanks Darcy. Couldn't even wait twenty four hours before making me help her grow up and be a woman! Oh the joy. (I did buy her own razor and cream when I went shopping last evening, so she's good to go.)

The kids all jumped right back into their lives last night. They met up with all their important friends after school. The joy in their faces was proof enough for me that they're okay. They all did the things they love the most; Dylan went to a concert, Dean had a hockey practice and Darcy had dance. All eight feet were dancing last night. Dancing to the music of life. Our crazy, wonderfully busy life.

I'm not as fine as I thought I was going to be. My heart is aching so much more now than I expected.
But with the knowledge of the support we have with our Friamily, I know I'll be okay.
Ian Thomas says "Time is the Healer". Absolutely.

And now, I pass our lives back into our own private world. I have tried to use words to help me understand this, this ..... disaster? Process? Significant Emotional Event. I will no longer use the blog. I have email, I have a land line and a cell phone and we are alive and well in our home. Please write, call or visit.

Thank you for listening to me. Thank you for the unbelievable comradeship, support and sharing you have done with us.

May our Angel Rest in Peace and guide our weary souls to joy.

I Love You Joanne.

SYLYM

After all the activity and stimulation that comes with a day at Disney, we found ourselves in the hot tub (outside) at the hotel.

I was asked the two biggest questions which I had been anticipating.
"If you're not married to mommy anymore, is she still our Mommy?"
Darcy asked this with her beautiful blue eyes full of curiosity, not concern.
"Of course she is, honey. She is your only Mommy and always will be."
"Okay. Sweet."
I guess Dean's gear's were turning on this and asked, well stated,
"If you ever get a girlfriend, I'll give her a hard time."
It was all I could not to laugh and tell him,
"that wouldn't be very nice, and what if it was (so and so)? Don't you think I would pick some one who you all would like?"
"Oh. Yeah. But (so and so) would be cool!"

With that, I really knew we were good to come home.

See y'all soon.
Uh huh.

Love,
Mike

To All Our Friends:
The following was sent to me by a special friend. We have been a support for each other as we lost our spouses and other close friends in our circle. All those who shared their thoughts with us in the blog have also been a support for us and we, the Daquano/d'Entremont families will cherish that forever. Thank you to all of you for being a friend.
Kay


Too Busy For A Friend

One day a teacher asked her students to list the names of the other students in the room on two sheets of paper, leaving a space between each name. Then she told them to think of the nicest thing they could say about each of their classmates and write it down.

It took the remainder of the class period to finish their assignment, and as the students left the room, each one handed in the papers. That Saturday, the teacher wrote down the name of each student on a separate sheet of paper, and listed what everyone else had said about that individual. On Monday she gave each student his or her list . Before long, the entire class was smiling. "Really?" she heard whispered. "I never knew that I meant anything to anyone!" and, "I didn't know others liked me so much." were most of the comments. No one ever mentioned those papers in class again. She never knew if they discussed them after class or with their parents, but it didn't matter. The exercise had accomplished its purpose. The students were happy with themselves and one another. That group of students moved on.

Several years later, one of the students was killed in Viet Nam and his teacher attended the funeral of that special student. She had never seen a serviceman in a military coffin before. He looked so handsome, so mature. The church was packed with his friends. One by one those who loved him took a last walk by the coffin. The teacher was the last one to bless the coffin. As she stood there, one of the soldiers who acted as pallbearer came up to her. "Were you Mark's math teacher?" he asked. She nodded: "yes." Then he said: "Mark talked about you a lot." After the funeral, most of Mark's former classmates went together to a luncheon. Mark's mother and father were there, obviously waiting to speak with his teacher.

"We want to show you something," his father said, taking a wallet out of his pocket. "They found this on Mark when he was killed. We thought you might recognize it. "Opening the billfold, he carefully removed two worn pieces of notebook paper that had obviously been taped, folded and refolded many times. The teacher knew without looking that the papers were the ones on which she had listed all the good things each of Mark's classmates had said about him. "Thank you so much for doing that," Mark's mother said. "As you can see, Mark treasured it."

All of Mark's former classmates started to gather around. Charlie smiled rather sheepishly and said, "I still have my list. It's in the top drawer of my desk at home. "Chuck's wife said, "Chuck asked me to put his in our wedding album." "I have mine too," Marilyn said. "It's in my diary." Then Vicki, another classmate, reached into her pocketbook, took out her wallet and showed her worn and frazzled list to the group "I carry this with me at all times," Vicki said and without batting an eyelash, she continued: "I think we all saved our lists." That's when the teacher finally sat down and cried. She cried for Mark and for all his friends who would never see him again.

The density of people in society is so thick that we forget that life will end one day. And we don't know when that one day will be. So please, tell the people you love and care for, that they are special and important. Tell them, before it is too late.

May your day be as blessed as you are special

As many of you know I wrote a poem about and for Joanne a few weeks ago entitled "This Child of My Womb". I read it to her to make sure it was okay and she gave me a little smile and nodded yes. I asked two of my nieces to have this put on cards and the result was a lovely card with an angel floating in the clouds on the front cover. There were 500 copies made and many people who were unable to be at the funeral reception did not get a copy. If anyone would like a copy, simply phone me at 905-877-6189 and leave a message, or blog me, with a comment here. I will see that you get one.

With much love
Kay

Contact Kay by leaving a comment with this blog entry containing your name, phone number, address
and/or email address. This info will be forwarded to Kay, then deleted for your privacy. - T

Okay. It's Friday. Afternoon. It's pretty close to one thosand degrees (you choose - either celsius or fahrenheit). We're on Boca Grande Beach - about 30 miles outside Port Charlotte, or if you will, about 30 minutes away. The water (Gulf of Mexico) is about 30 degrees celsius. AND THERE IS NO ONE HERE!!

Not one teenager skipping school to go for a dip and drink beer on the beach. Not one family with their umbrella's parked in the sand, and chilfren digging in the sand. There are two couples - obvously from their accent they are from New York (why do they have to yell-speak to each other? They're sitting side by each.), and there is a mom with her two little girls. She's taking pictures of them frolicking in the surf. Oh. There's the hubby - he was dragging the cooler, the chairs, towels and umbrella - I can hear what HE is thinking!

It is truly off season right now. Quite peaceful. Warm ocean breeze. Sitting under a gazebo drinking Michelob Lights (hoh!), watching and listening to the waves come in.

Our driveways are as clean as my Gramma's place. We are ready to go.
We are coming home.

Just gonna visit the King at Graceland and the Rock 'N Roll Hall of Fame first.

See you when we get back.
Hugs,
M

We have just finished the hottest day of our stay so far. It was 40 degrees at the beach this afternoon and it was 35 degrees when we came out of the restaurant at 7:30 or so.

Today has been a day of no tears - the first one. For the first time in two weeks I feel like myself again and time doesn't have that surreal quality to it. I was thinking this morning that it feels like we have all eight feet on the ground. So I tossed out this nugget, "Would you guys mind if we headed home a little early?" The huge chorus of "YES!" truly surprised me.

After going over a scenario that would see us home by Friday (29th), I really got the feeling that this trip may have been more for me than for my beautiful children. Yes, they're beautiful, but they're still my children and I am the father. I needed to scold them, and calm them down, and tell them how to behave all day. Nothing in an unusual way, same old Mike on an adventure with his same old kids. They (especially Dean) love to push the limit and see what they can get away with ... and they have been doing so almost the whole time we've been away. I know that kids are resilient, I just never expected that my kids would have their resiliency tested.

I believe they've passed the test.

Now let's see what happens when we "get back to reality."

I'm beginning to think this blog may have now run its course. I will confer with the blog master upon my return and we will decide a final date for posting to it. Just like all of us, it will need closure too.

In the meantime, if you have something you've been waiting to say, please say it. There are still people listening.

Sunburnt and Ready to Come Home.

All my love,
Mike

With thanks to Tara Houlihan-Howse


If you look up into the northern sky tonight you might see a new star.

Well, it is not really a new star, but the star that was previously known as:

star number Ursa Minor RA 5h 9m 27.64s D89° 26' 16.68"

has been redesignated to the name - Joanne's Light

Below is the certificate dated - September 11th, 2006

.

.

If you would like to see a copy of the complete documentation of the naming process send an email to teddq@cogeco.ca and it will be sent to you in a day or two.

I have had an interesting few days at work and "PLAY" I have met many people who know Joanne or Mike or who have heard of them and what has transpired over the past few weeks.

Joanne followed me around at work the past few days. Songs were playing in houses that are her. "Arms Of The Angel " was playing in one house. I saw two placards in one day at different houses that spoke of passion. One of them said, "In Life, Many things will catch your eye, few things will capture your heart, These are the things that you should pursue." I learned that a Martin guitar is being raffled off at Pine Cone Studios for $10.00 A ticket. All proceeds go to the Daquano Children's trust fund. I learned this from Craig Shnieder who Mike knows well. I hadn't seen him in years and just bumped into him one night. I was with friends at Barber Town on Wed. and I noticed that the advertising screen showed that Power Zone fitness is doing a fundraiser for breast cancer in memory of Joanne Daquano. I said to people "That's MY Sister'", She is definitely having an impact.

I have felt a light and energy surrounding me that I have not felt in a long, long, time. I am happy that Mike has chosen to keep us up to date on the progress of the Eight Feet left in the immediate Family. I, myself have discovered that the FRIAMILY is larger than I thought. Even after such a huge and awesome tribute as happened last week. Thurs, after the wake, I saw Larry Milton play at Barber Town. He was playing "Knocking On Heaven's Door" when I walked in and had just dedicated it to Joanne. He almost choked up when he saw me as I rarely go there at all any more.

I think that we can trust that our Angel is alive and well and looking out for all of us, Giving still and continuously. We can count ourselves lucky to have such an Angel on our side.

I miss you Joanne. And I miss Mike and Dylan and Dean and Darcy. I can't wait to see you and tell you in person about these things that are happening. Rest well and know that Much Love is sent your way every second of the day.

All my Love,
Uncle Paul

My friends and colleagues at the Columbus Jewish Day School (CJDS), where I teach, have made the following tribute to Joanne:

A contribution has been made to The Columbus Jewish Day School (for Valerie Derrick)

IN MEMORY OF JOANNE DAQUANO

by the Staff at CJDS
79 North High Street
New Albany, Ohio 43054

September 19, 2006

This gift will enhance and enrich Jewish education and the lives of Columbus' Jewish families for many years to come.

So ... the friamily grows and now includes members of a totally different faith but with hearts as dedicated to teaching and caring for children as Joanne's was! - Pay it forward!

Mike, I'm sending the hard copy of the tribute to your mom to pass along to you when you get home.

Love, Val

Dear Mike:

I remember meeting you and Joanne through mutual friends years ago. I will always have fond memories of the good times we all had together. Joanne and I were pregnant at the same time - Joanne with your second child and me with my first. I was anxious about the whole childbirth process. Joanne was always so good at explaining to me what was going to happen and reassuring me that everything was going to be all right.

Mike, when I saw you, I was very concerned about what I would say to you at a time like this. Then, later when I read a message posted on Joanne's blog entitled "Finding the Right Words" by M.J., I believe this person put it into words for me. It said, "I was concerned about finding the right words to say to comfort you and your family. Needless to say, I had nothing to worry about ... it was not I who had the comforting words but rather Joanne's family who's words comforted me". Mike, that is what you did. Thank you. I admire your strength and your love and devotion to your wife and kids.

I have to admit that when you asked me if my driveway was clean, I did not have a clue what you were talking about. Now that I know, I want to say thank you. Your son has taught me a valuable life lesson that I have passed onto my son and my family.

God Bless you Joanne
God Bless you Mike, Dylan, Dean, and Darcy

Penny Wood

Have I told you that I love you today?

It's raining. Pouring, really. David Gilmour (from Pink Floyd) is singing "Shine On You Crazy Diamond".
Rain and Shine.

We talked yesterday, the kids and I. A good talk. I held up pretty good through it, but did have a few moments of tears. When they talk about their mom they decided they will use "passed away" to express what has happened.
"It's more mature," says Darcy.
"It was only her body anyway," Dylan said.
"It just sounds right," said Dean

We were in the pool when talking about this. Calm, warm, soothing water encircling us.

I don't have my ring on anymore, it's with all of Joanne's at home. So I talked to them about designing a "family ring", where Darcy can have the big diamond (Yes!, she liked that idea very much) and they can share the rest from the wedding band and anniversary ring. We will melt the gold and mix it with new gold, and we will all share it's unending beauty. Of course they will have to be re-sized as fingers get bigger, but they all did promise to wear their ring.

We promised each other that Friday nights will be "games" night. A night when we all sit together and play something and/or do something together. We realize that we lead busy lives and that some Friday nights might not be available, so we will do it one other night during the weekend.

I also have "suspended" my rule of no sleepovers during the week during school. For the next little while anyway. There are going to be some nights when they just need a "mom" to talk to them, hug them and love them in that special way only a mom can.

The idea of just staying here in Florida came up - I had wondered, whether or not they had thought about that. It was truly amazing for me to watch them process this and realize what lives they have to get back to. Friends, family, hockey, dance, guitar. They realized that to stay here would only be like running away from a problem - it eventually catches up to you, and more likely than not has changed into something worse. A big, heavy, wet-snow filled driveway - absolutely the most difficult to clean.

Then we had enough of our serious talk. I picked up Dean and chucked him in the deep end. Same with Darcy. Dylan knows I can't do that with him so he came over and gave me a headlock, and I was challenged to get out of it! He is so strong - physically, emotionally and spritually.

What great children I have.
What a legacy.
Have I told you that I love you today?

SYLYM

Hi Tina,

The documentary Don't Stand Still is currently scheduled to air on Wednesday October 4 th at 1:00 pm E/P. This inspiring documentary follows five women as they participate in the 60K Weekend to End Breast Cancer walkathon to raise money for breast cancer research.

Of course, since schedules are always subject to change without notice, it's always a good idea to refer to our on-line schedule closer to the air date for updated W Network programming information: http://www.wnetwork.com/schedule/

Regards,
W Network Viewer Relations Department


I would urge you to set up your video players to record this show. Not only is this an amazingly inspirational show, but rumour has it that they are going to dedicate this showing to our Joanne.

Cheers,
Tina Daquano

11:38 am and all three are still sleeping.

Dylan is a teenager and therefore a sloth so I understand his need for sleep.

Dean has always loved sleep, but I think he is starting his "change" and will be a teenager in a year ... and therfore a sloth.

I'm wondering about my darling daughter Darcy. She slept a lot in the car on the way down. I'm hoping she is just "catching up" on some sleep.

I suppose all three of them can be excused for the need to "catch up". The emotional roller coaster we've been on has taken its toll, and I think we will be riding it for a while. The Great Daquano Mind Buster. Thank God we all LIKE roller coasters!

Me? I've already grocery shopped and put it away; folded and put away pool/beach wear and towels; had my cuppa tea and read 50 pages or so of James Patterson's "Lake House". (Did you know there was a character who is widow, having lost her husband Mike from cancer last year? I ask this question of my Angel who directed me to this book when I was packing - because I don't remember packing it!)

I am now just waiting for noon and an ice cold Michelob.

OK, it's noon somewhere.

SYLYM

Hi Mike & Family

I hope the weather is nice in Florida …

When I got home on Saturday my drive way was already cleaned but then I noticed the bathroom needed to be done. So off I go cleaning it– in the same clothes that I wore on Saturday to the funeral. Darren comes in from hockey try outs and asked these “follow up” questions.

Hi mom … how was the funeral?
I said amazing and beautiful.

A lot of people?
I said the church was full.

Was the Bishop there?
Nope, he’s in Rome with the Pope.

Did you have enough tissues?
Yep, I had some left.

WHAT KIND OF MUSIC DID THEY PLAY IN THE BIG BLACK CAR?
(Taken back by the question I asked why you would ask that question.)
Remember when we went to see her that night there was music playing in the room.
Oh yes, I remember. I said ...
I bet they were playing “time of my life” by green day. I like that song he said.

I like the pink ribbon that you have on.
I said that a friend gave it to me, isn’t it lovely.

Is everything going to be ok?
Everything will be ok … Tears mend the heart, laughter brings home I said …

TTFN
Laura

ps – Darren changed his hockey tape on his stick on the weekend from black to pink to honour Joanne.

So sad to hear of your loss.

I truly do not know what to say, nor how to say it. And after reading your words Mike, I realize that you have found strength that has brought you comfort and that is definitely a gift from your beautiful wife. I hope that if I ever have to experience what you have just experienced for the last seven years, I can only find the same strength. As an old friend from Georgetown High, I want to let you know that you are in our thoughts and prayers. You and Jo were truly blessed to have each, along with 3 beautiful children.

I always thought Joanne had a special way about her. She was so kind and pleasant whenever you ran into her out shopping or in Tim Hortons or anywhere for that matter. I think the Circus was one of the last places I saw Jo and I can still hear her now calling me across the stands 5 rows down, saying hi and wanting to know all about our three children. Joanne had a gift. She always spoke to you, even if she only saw you once a year. Some people may shy away and think you don't recocgnize them, but not her, she always went out of her way to say hello. I will remember her for that.

Mike, I so remember the days when you and Joanne prepared Dan and I for the journey of marrage at Holy Cross. I was hesitant to think that the prep. weekends would make us feel any more prepared than we already felt. We were wrong. Everyone, especially you and Joanne made the weekends really fun. We thank you both for that. I feel honored to have known Joanne. Her big smile is one memory that I will always remember. I am very saddened to think that I couldn't have kept in touch more with such a wonderful person.

Our thoughts and Prayers are with you and your children always.


When someone you love becomes a memory
The memory becomes a treasure

Take care,
Diane Pelow (nee Hoare) Milton, Ont

I found this lovely poem that just sounded so much like Jo,
I wanted to share it with everyone.

Linda


When You See
by Lucy Linder.

When you see a sky of blue
Think of me and remember my favorite colour,
The one of peace and tranquility

When you see a beautiful flower arrangement
Remember me, my love of children and their special talents
I encouraged in my students.

When you see birds on the wing
Know that my spirit soars with them
In graceful compliment to their flight.

When you see a special smile
Realize that I still smile with you
For all the wonderful times we shared.

When you hear roaring laughter
Think of all the funny things
That could never happen to anyone else but me.

When you hear a child cry
Dry the tears and try not to mourn
But, celebrate all that was joyful, in all our years together

When you feel a gentle breeze
Stop and listen for a moment
You will hear my voice reassuring you to keep doing your best.

When you hear a lovely song
Think of music, gatherings, holidays and parties,
The memories that can never be silenced.

When you hug someone gently
Remember my touch
And know that I am hugging you and keeping you close.

When you see a rainbow
And the sun shining through the raindrops
Remember the promises of God and be assured
I am at peace and in his presence.

Got here at 6:30 tonight (Monday).

We're swimming. Well, I went in for a dip, and the kids are swimming.
"I love this place", has been said a few times already.
I hope everyone is getting along okay up there.
I've had my moments, but overall am fine.

Love to all.
See you soon,
M

[Not a 'Worlds Record' but with the help of a little Pixie dust and under the
protective wings of an Angel, they sure made it there in bloody quick time.]

This blog will remain active for some time to come.
You will be given ample notice before it is closed,
so if you wish to post something do not hesitate to
send your notes and pictures to teddq@cogeco.ca
Thanks, T

Hello to my new adopted family,

It is funny how life goes by ... .sometimes you feel like you have the right words to say other times you are scared to death you will say the wrong words. With Joanne's passing if you are hesitant to stop by or afraid that you may say something inappropriate ... don't worry the whole family will make you feel like you are their family. It truly is an incredible gift.

I had the honour of stopping by today to visit Joanne and her family and while I was driving there I was concerned about finding the right words to say to comfort them in their obvious time of loss. Of being strong, in such time of sadness. Well, needless to say I had nothing to worry about ... it was not I who had the comforting words but rather Joanne's family who's words comforted me. Even at this time ... your words supported me, Dylan and Dean included. While I know this is tough, I can also tell ... you will all come through this because of your faith and the strength that Joanne has left for all of you. The foundation she has built is strong and solid.

They say that love gives you strength and while I was sick ... the love of my family and friends gave me strength and it was quite clear to me by the love I saw today ... you will have lots of strength to draw from.

So while I thought I would be bringing a shovel today ... it was actually Joanne's family who cleared my driveway ... in only a way they could. So here is hoping that I (and the whole Centurions team) could at least clear part of the sidewalk for you !!

With love and thanks,
M.J.

[Note - Dave Greene is a neighbour of the DQ's. He wrote to his friends and family coast-to-coast with the purpose of sharing the story of Joanne's blog. His wife thought I would be comforted to know that the DQ's got off on their trip in good spirits and sent me a copy. I was touched by the sincerity of his words and with Dave's permission, have included excerpts of his letter. - Ted]

Subject: RIP Joanne Daquano

A "beautiful" funeral was held yesterday in this smallish town. One of the town's most treasured could fight the good fight no more, after seven painful years.

She has left behind three incredibly resilient children and one superbly strong and enlightened man. She was just 41, my age now! The line-ups for the viewings were close to two hours long and the church was packed to standing room only, in excess of 400 by my math. As I said to my wife on our way home from the funeral, she may have gotten "only" 41 years on this Earth, but she affected more lives than the majority of people do in twice that time. She was escorted from the church by an honour guard of the Ladies Auxiliary holding tiny white candles, hockey teammates wearing their team jerseys and young ladies in full regalia with their Irish Dancer consumes. Simply joyous and heartwrenching at the same time.

Our neighbours, the four who continue to give at a time when they should be receiving, just pulled out of their driveway fifteen minutes ago enroute to Florida and ideally, greener pastures. As Mike said "they need to learn to become a family again and stand on their own eight legs". We wish them peace,harmony and healing! The timing was impeccable as I was literally cleaning my driveway with a pressure washer at the time and yelled out to all of them "I'm cleaning my driveway, just a few stubborn spots that don't want to leave" - that gave them all a good chuckle and they were off with a hearty goodbye. You will understand the driveway reference if you take a moment to read her website below.

I encourage all of you to visit her blog to fully understand what an impact this lady, and her family, have had and continue to have on this caring town: [Update on Joanne]

Maybe we all can learn a little more about strength, love and grace. They have certainly given us the lessons, it is our task now to simply share them with others.

Godspeed!

Dave

Well I've written and re-writen this message quite a few times. Words have failed me now. I can not expresss the deep loss I feel or the extreme sense of sorrow I have for Mike's and Dylan, Dean and Darcy's loss. I need to know my brother will be okay. I gently and from a distance have followed him around (like someone else we know) these past few days to make sure he is okay.

Now the toughest part begins. Letting go so they can heal in their own way and in their own time. Letting go so I can heal. Immediately Mike and the kids are going to Florida. They will regroup and figure out a way to be 4. They need to learn to stand on their own 8 legs as Mike says. I get to go back to my own life. Come Monday morning at 9:00am, for the first time in months I will have "nothing" to do. I know I won't be alone. There are lots of places I can go. For a coffree. I wish though, just one more time it could be with Jo.

Even though Jo's gone we can live well in her memory and feel her presence and know we are truly better people for knowing her. This songs means a lot to me and it represent hope on the other side of sorrow, that we can live well in loss and be touched by Joanne's life. Her beauty. Her radiance. Her afterglow.

Love, hugs and a few "foreheads"
Kim

Afterglow
INXS - (Andrew Farriss, Desmond Child)

Here I am
Lost in the light of the moon
That comes through my window
Bathed in blue
The walls of my memory
Divides the thorns from the roses
It's you and the roses

Touch me and I will follow
In your afterglow
Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go

I will find my way
When I see your eyes
Now I'm living
In your afterglow

Here I am
Lost in the ashes of time
But who owns tomorrow
In between
The longing to hold you again
I'm caught in your shadow
I'm losing control
My mind drifts away
We only have today

Touch me and I will follow
In your afterglow
Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go

I will find my way
I will sacrifice
Till that blinding day
When I see your eyes
Now I'm living
In your afterglow

When the veils are gone
As I let you go
As I let you go

Touch me and I will follow
In your afterglow
Heal me from all this sorrow
As I let you go

I will find my way
I will sacrifice
Now I'm living
In your afterglow
Bathed in blue
The walls of my memory
Divides the thorns from the roses
It's you who is closest

Saturday September 16, 2006 - 10:41 pm

I buried my wife today.
I am 40 years old - as of February 15, 2006 - I am 40 years old.
I buried my wife today.

My twelve year old son is upstairs whistling a happy tune.
He buried his mother today.

My (almost) fourteen year old son kissed his girlfriend goodbye tonight (in front of me for the first time - and I told her I love her).
He buried his mother today.

My ten year old daughter was doing gymnastics in the living room of her best friend tonight as we drove past (she's is having yet another sleepover).
She buried her mother today.

I spent a few hours with my family today. What laughter we had. What love we shared.
I spent a few hours with Joanne's family today. What laughter we had. What love we shared.
I spend a good long time with my friends today. My very best friends. What beer we drank. What champagne with which we toasted our Angel. What laughter we had. What love we shared.

What tears we cried. Tears of joy are absolutely the best tears of all.

How many times can you say you were at a beautiful funeral? We did it right.

I had no idea how to do this. I had no idea how I was going to get through this day. I was as scared and as alone as I have ever felt in my entire life. And then you were there. You. My friamily ... a new word for you. F R I A M I L Y.
The Daquano book of words:
FRIAMILY: the combination of friends and family that forms one gi-normous loving unit. All encompassing, all loving.

Did you see the friends of my children come to them at the single most difficult time they may experience in their entire lives? Did you feel the love? We did it right. My children will be okay. I will be okay.

Oh yes there will be pain. There will be tears. There will be times when the aching feeling of loss will not be comforted except crying into a pillow until sleep finally eases the sorrow.
But we have our Friamily to help us. You.

When we got home there was a cooler full of snacks and a fridge full of sandwiches and yogurt tubes and Love. There was a "travel pack" for Darcy. It doesn't matter what is in it ... it's Darcy's; we didn't look into it, but we know it is full of love. There was a road map with the route to Florida (down I-75) and all the "deals" you can find along that route. It was a road map to love.

We buried our Angel today. Under a maple tree for shade in summer, protection in winter. A place to rest a weary soul in spring, a place to lay on a blanket wearing a comfy sweater in the fall. I saw all of this in the instant I raised my eyes to the sky and saw our Angel smile down on us with that gorgeous, infectious smile. My God how gloriously beautiful is our Angel.

Do these words express my thanks to you? Can you feel my love?
From the depth of my soul, you have raised me up, you have comforted my being.
Thank you to all our friends and family, our Friamily. We will lean on you. We will depend on you.
We do love you.

I buried my wife today.
Thank God she is at rest.

SYLYM (See Ya, Love Ya, Me)

In November, I will be doing another play. This one is called “Some Assembly Required”. It’s about a dysfunctional family that gets together at Christmas time and tries to sort out some issues from the past. The title refers to an old artificial Christmas tree that has to be assembled by hand and is done by way of colors on the ends of the branches and there are different color coded branches. The biggest branches have one color and the smaller ones have others so that the tree will look the same every year. The problem is that after so many years, the colors have all worn off the ends and it becomes more difficult to put the tree back together as we once remembered it. So the tree may and does end up looking somewhat askew.

We all come home and some of us isolate ourselves and slowly, we start to talk to one another. We start to sort things out, sometimes in anger with harsh words and sometimes in frustration at not knowing how we fit together now as a family because again, the familiar colors from our past have started to wear off and our family, when assembled, may not look or feel quite the same as it once did. The point is that we do come together, and we do try with each other and even though things are a bit askew, like the tree, we put things together and we are still a family that has at it’s roots, a great deal of genuine love for one another.

From time to time, we need to assemble. We need to be together and to be reminded of where we come from so that we may better see where it is we are going. The branches of our family tree are here. And some of them are missing and it won’t look the same as it once did. But we are and will remain a Family.

I will dedicate my performance in November to Joanne for she is what family means to me and she has shown us how to come together and she will help us to re assemble ourselves and our lives in the most loving and appropriate ways. I will leave you with a Quote from Pope John-Paul II which has been a great comfort to me since he went home to the Lord and I think Joanne would like it.

“Have no fear of moving into the unknown
Simply step out fearlessly
Knowing that I am with you
Therefore, No harm can befall you
All is very, very well.
Do this in complete faith and confidence.”

My unending Love and Peace and Prayers to each of you.

I knelt down and prayed to God with my children. The precious gifts given to me by God and my Angel.
It gives me peace.
It gives me hope.
It eases my pain.

Upon our completion, we were about to leave when my wonderful friend Toby Chisholm [Funeral Director] reminded/told me that the casket will be closed tomorrow ... as is custom.
I should say my goodbyes.

How do I do this?
How can I take a few moments to encapsulate a lifetime's worth of love?
What could I possibly have said that would even remotely have any significance or bearing to what is us? Or is that "was" us?
WE ARE.
WE WERE.
WE WILL BE.
We have always signed our cards to each other "Forever and Always". My God how significant is THAT?
My God the pain, the sorrow, the hurt, the surreal. Help me understand. Give me peace; give me strength.

I knelt down on my knees (funny how comfortable it actually was). I prayed to God with an Our Father, and I asked God to welcome our Angel into his house. I asked him to give her the keys to his house in case she came home late one night having to watch over one of us.
I asked him to peek in on us every once in a while to make sure we were okay. Bless our hearts for they are sad. Give us the strength to overcome our fear. Let our Angel watch over us, and give us some signs that she is there ... in our actions and in our words.

My God. My Angel.
Farewell. (Goodbye seems so trivial.)
We shall meet again in the house of our Lord.
I love you.
Goodbye.

Dear Mike, Dylan, Dean and Darcy,

Just to let you know that on Saturday Dragons Abreast will be paddling in Stratford. We are paddling with 13 other breast cancer teams. Many carnations will be tossed into the water during the Breast Cancer tribute after our final race. Our carnations will be for Joanne and all women that have been lost to this dreaded disease.

May you find comfort in your memories of Joanne as we will.

Paddles Down,
Joanna Chrystal
Dragons Abreast

Mike, Dylan, Dean, Darcy,
Bev and Ted, and all the rest of Joanne's family and circle of friends.

I have a friend who lost her husband in June from lung cancer. When I told her about Joanne, she sent me the following poem, which I felt just needed to be on the blog. It's to all of you,
Love, Val
[Val is a cousin of Bev's living in Ohio]

And if I go while you're still here

Know that I still live on
Vibrating to a different measure
behind a thin veil you cannot see through.

You will not see me
So you must have faith.

I wait the time when we can soar together again
Both aware of each other.

Until then, live your life to the fullest
And when you need me
Just whisper my name in your heart
I will be there.

Untitled,
by Colleen Hitchcock

Dearest Jo

This pit in my stomach just won’t go away,
I think of you constantly throughout the day.
I knew that your loss would cause me some pain,
But it breaks my heart that I won’t see you again.

When I look at Dylan, Darcy and Dean,
I SEE your smile & my driveways not clean.
I will need a shovel for the next little while,
But for now I find comfort from an angel with style.

You were the friend everyone hoped to obtain,
The kind gentle spirit who was filled with such pain,
Yet time and again, it was compassion you brought,
My friend I will miss you, and the lessons you taught.

Not just to your students, but to each one of us,
On how to be tender, to not make a fuss.
I will miss you Joanne, but I find comfort today,
That you will be waiting, when I see you some day.

Love you,
Max

Always the Teacher …

Even now, Joanne is teaching the youth in the classrooms of Halton – this time Mike is by her side. I had been doing a fairly good job of reserving my tears for private moments until Wednesday’s grade 8 Religion class. The topic was “Marriage and Holy Orders: Signs and Teachers of Love”. As I read aloud to the class St. Paul’s message that “the most important quality we can have is to be able to love,” my thoughts started drifting to Joanne and Mike. The lesson then called for the students to listen to a beautiful song which is based on 1 Corinthians 13.

Love is patience; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful: it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends.” - 1 Corinthians 13.4-8

Needless to say, the tears spontaneously started to flow. I explained to my class that Joanne had passed away (they knew about Joanne as we had been praying for her) and that I was very sad. The class was quieter than they had ever been. I spoke to them of the love that radiated from the marriage that Joanne and Mike shared and the unwavering love of their family and friends. I explained how the joy of the love that they shared spread to all those around them and how their love and commitment was strengthened by Joanne’s illness not weakened. Also, that Mike’s love expressed so completely and openly had left me in awe. We discussed the fact that ‘love never ends’ and how the love that Joanne and Mike shared will always be and that Joanne’s love for her children will always be felt by them. I regained my composure just as the bell rang. This morning I went to my desk before school had started and found several expressions of sympathy from my students. There was a plate of home baked cookies, a beautiful drawing of a flower and several cards. I was overwhelmed and the tears started again. I truly believe that Mike and Joanne are ‘Teachers of Love’ to all of us.

Thank you both for your lessons.

Love
Constance

Ted, my sincere condolences on the passing of Joanne.
If you are still accepting submissions to the blog, I would be honoured if you would include an e-mail that I received from my 81 year old Father this morning. (He has met DQ and Joanne over the years a few times, and remembers them fondly.)
All the best Ted.
John Wheeler

From Stephen Wheeler,

Hi John:
Stephanie told Mum about Mike’s Wife, about how she’d been fighting cancer for years, and how she’d been in hospital for the last month or so.

It is of little consolation to Mike and his children at a time like this but, having briefly felt the shadow of cancer myself just two years ago, and having had to see the state of folks in advanced stages of such a disease, I can imagine the sufferer reaching a point where death is eventually welcomed as a last final release. One thing I know from experience is that celebrating the Life of a loved one is more comforting than mourning the loved one’s death. I sometimes wonder if our grief at such a loss is more due to our fear that we’ll forget the person, but true Love doesn’t allow that; the pain reduces over time but good memories never go away, they stay with us forever.

Please convey our sincere condolences to Mike, and his children, in the loss of his Wife.

Joanne's Light:
After talking with Tina, I chose to name a star in the constellation after Joanne. I wasn't sure what would be a fitting name, and I decided to go with "Joanne's light". I felt that this would cover so much of what Joanne has been to so many people ... the Light of Love, the Light of Faith, the Light of Courage, the Light of Hope, the Light of Friendship, the Light of Peace, the Light of Joy and the Light of Strength.
Joanne, your star will always be shining for all to see.

May God carry you all in the palm of his hand in your time of need.

Keeping you close in our thoughts and our prayers,

Paul, Tara & Jordan Howse

[Note - At this time we have no details, but will blog them as they are know]

I have spent a lot of time thinking about Joanne and Mike and the kids over the last several weeks, as so many of us have, and thinking about how lucky I am to have been welcomed into their lives. I first met Joanne at a training walk for the WEBC when we started shooting the documentary, then met the rest of the family at the hair salon a few days later when Dean and Mike had their heads shaved in support.

I knew immediately that this was a very special family and that feeling came over me often as I had the privilege of getting to know them and traveling a little bit of this journey with them. Mike, Dylan, Dean, Darcy, Kay – thank you for sharing your story. I can’t count the number of people who asked me about Joanne after seeing the documentary and told me how affected they were by her. There will be more walkers, runners, cyclists out there every year, raising money for the cause, because of Jo.

The Daquanos have taught me a lot about love and friendship and faith and priorities – lessons that will stay with me and influence me forever.

I won’t be able to be there this week as you all gather to pay tribute to Joanne. I am in Victoria shooting a television special. But I will think of you coming together and think of Joanne, as I so often do. Mary Frymire, who worked on the documentary with me and lives in Vancouver, is coming to join me in Victoria on Friday and after the show taping is finished, we will go sit by the ocean, look at the mountains and share our memories of this wonderful woman.

With love to you all,

Lynn Harvey

What a truly amazing day.

I said it often and out loud many times yesterday, but nothing could have pleased me more to see that this horrible disease cancer could not steal the beauty of my precious angel.
I was fully intending to mask her pain and suffering from all of our friends and supporters, but when I got to her side yesterday she was as radiant as ever.
Only and Angel can do this for us ..... give us a vision of beauty even in death.

The bounty of beautiful images surrounding us keeps us from wallowing at the trough of sorrow.

We are full of sorrow, but we are also full of joy;
There were a lot of tears shed yesterday, some for pain, some for sorrow, and some for joy.
With each tear our driveways get a little more clear and after a short rest will be even easier to shovel.

Please do not worry about tears in front of us. We are comforted in the knowledge that Joanne is no longer in pain and can rest well.
She will be missed, but she shall not be forgotten.

Come if you can, leave if you must. We know your thoughts and prayers are always with us.

Love,
Mike

When you guys are feeling sad and missing your mom, just remember she's not very far. She'll always be watching you from above and hopefully that will comfort you. She gave you life and now she will live on in your hearts and guide you through your journey.


Hugs and Kisses
Mary Power
(Jennibear's mom)

Dear Dylan,
My heart goes out to you and your family during this very difficult time. I know how hard it is to lose a parent as I lost my father when I was young also. The timing is never right, but it hardly seems fair that your mother had to go at such a young age. Your mother was a truly kind and remarkable woman. Her faith and her strength during her fight against cancer was a real inspiration to all who met her. I will keep you and your family in my prayers. I know that you will always be safe because you now have a special angel to watch over you from Heaven.
God bless,
Dianna Reid
(Madame)

Dear Mike.

Thank you for sharing your experience with us. How amazing and beautiful. I’ve finally told Darren of Joanne passing, I wasn’t sure how he would take it as the death of Bandit the cat took 3 days to get over.

These are the questions that he asked of you and your family (He saw the picture of her in the paper)
Is that Joanne? - I said yes.
He said - she looks so beautiful with hair. (Darren has never seen Joanne with long hair)
Mom, look at her smile, she has a beautiful smile ...
WAIT - bonesy doesn’t have a mom ... Will he be ok? - Yes I said.
WAIT - All the Daquano kids have lost there mom. Will they be ok? - Yes I said
Do they know that she died (remember, he’s only 7) – I said yes, Mike told the kids and they said there good byes on the weekend.
Mom, will Mike be ok? - I said yes.
Mom, she was on TV wasn’t she? - I said yes ...
Mom, do you think she is looking down at us from heaven with a big smile like the one in the picture? - I said yes.
Mom, do you think she is happy? - I said yes because she is with her dad.
Mom, are you sad and did you cry? - I said yes, I cried a little (ok I cried a lot)
Mom, do you think that Tawny will be ok? - I said yes, Tawny will be ok (Darren doesn’t know Target – he used to play with Tawny at Robin’s house when she was a puppy)
I told him that she died the day after the cancer walk.
He said. "That is very nice."
Darren asked if I was walking again next year, I said yes.
He asked if I would walk for her and I said yes.

Our thoughts are with you and your families
Laura, Richard & Darren Pydych

Hello,
My name is Heidi and I just wanted to send my deepest condolences to Mike and the kids and his entire network of friends and family over the loss of Joanne on September 11, 2006.

I had the pleasure of working with Mike as I bossed him around for a few weeks a year ago showing him “Heidi’s Ropes” at BRC …I betcha he hasn’t used any of them ... hm ... probably not.

I had an opportunity to meet Joanne one day as she drove to Mike at BRC to bring him a thermos of soup for lunch and I have to say that brief five minute meeting was enough for me to know that I had just met a wonderful superhero.

I have dealt with the tragedy that cancer brings to a family and I can’t say that I will never know how to deal with the way it takes the most special people in the world.

My thoughts and prayers are with you Mike, Darcy, Dean and Dylan ... God bless you on your journey of healing as God has blessed Joanne on hers.

Sincerely,
Heidi Elizabeth O'Malley

Dear, Mike,Dylan,Dean and Darcy,

You are in our thoughts and prayers.
Joanne really is an angel.

Love from
Jean, Santo, Amy and Paul Chiappetta aka Chippy.

A Special Night

Last evening the d’Entremont clan gathered at David/Sheri’s home to give Mike , Dylan, Dean and Darcy hugs. We ordered in Chinese food, had a glass of wine or beer and tried to unwind. The eleven grandchildren, together with some of the girlfriends, Dean/Deb Marks and their two little boys Adam and Liam (just kept Sadie, the dog going).

Around nine o’clock another dimension was added. In came the Burke and Knoepfli family, at least the ones living in Georgetown. My best “bud” Anna Burke passed away two years ago, quite unexpectedly. Our kids grew up together, sharing lots of family outings and always being there for one another. Now, here they were for us – how natural is that? Anna’s three granddaughters brought “Grandma Kay” three beautiful roses. We had a lovely visit with all of them. It was so warm and cozy, like old times. We did miss Chris and his family and Roberta (Bert) and hers, but unfortunately for them they no longer live in Georgetown and we will see them later this week. They were, however, with us in thought.

Linda (Dan’s wife) spent many hours making the families some pink ribbons with tiny crosses on them that we will wear as a tribute to Jo during the next few days and long after. How very special these are. Thank you Linda for going that extra mile and doing these in your so busy life. Sheri and Dave as ever the gracious host and hostess for opening your home to us all. I have come to have distaste for the term in-law. These ladies have been like my own daughters and I cherish them both.

The next few days will be difficult ones, but I know we are surrounded with love from both the Daquano and d’Entremont families and our extended families. May love and peace continue to abide with us.

Mom, Grandma Kay, (aka Mrs. d' )

This is story I promised on how I knew that Joanne's path was ready ...

11:07pm, Sunday September 10, 2006

I have just finished saying four decades of the Rosary out loud to my angel.
I don’t know if the fact that I only completed four is of any significance, but I do know this ...

As I entered the second decade, I closed my eyes because I didn’t like to look at the tremors that were shaking Joanne’s body. Her eyes were rolling back into her head and she was having the same kinds of tremors that I had seen before, but I knew these tremors were not because of medication. I closed my eyes because I was still unsure if wanted to be there at the exact moment she passed on to the Lord. I was unsure if I wanted to see her die. I have been preparing for this day since that first day back in May of ‘99, and yet I was still unsure how to do it.

With all of this uncertainty running through me, I relaxed as I entered the second Hail Mary. And that’s when it happened. At first it just felt like a presence; a warm, comforting breeze. Instead of ignoring it, I decided to explore it. When I opened my mind’s eye, the images were not crystal clear, not LCD or Plasma screen clear, not even "old photograph" clear, but I could tell that there were two figures close to me. I felt reassured, safe, and motivated. I straightened my back and held the palm of my left hand up. My right hand was holding Joanne’s. I continued to pray, but with more confidence and joy all the while still trying to discern just who were these two figures that had made me feel so safe; hoping that my prayers were exactly what Joanne wanted at this exact moment.

As I neared the end of the Glory Be, I was pleased to realize that these two figures had come down from The Stairway to Heaven. They had softly yet confidently come down the stairs with smiles on their faces and their robes flowing. Peace, tranquility and warmth came with them. Step by step, one at a time, with confidence and no sense of urgency at all, they came down the stairs. They came to me and placed a hand on my shoulder and made me feel right. I finished the Glory Be, and realized that it was Jesus and Joanne’s father Del who had given me peace and showed me that they had prepared Joanne’s stairway. I could see the light far away at the top of the stairway, and I could see the stairway lined with many people who had the same peace, tranquility and warmth exuding from their mere presence.

They spoke no words. They made no gestures towards the stairway. They simply let me know, that by the power of my prayer, they were called to come to me and show me that the path to heaven for Joanne was a stairway. Each step would match each step she had taken in life. Each step would be trod slowly, but with confidence, and no sense of urgency. Each step she will be revered by the people helping her make the trip to the light. While I knew that she would be held high and supported by the prayers of all of our friends and family, it became clear to me that Joanne’s achievements and accomplishments on earth will pale in comparison to those that she will achieve in eternity.

I knew that whether I was right there with Joanne, or was sleeping on the other bed in the same room, she was going to be taken care of in Heaven by the same kind of loving people who have taken care of her on earth.

Tonight, I met Jesus.
This is my Angel’s gift to me.
The one last thing she needed to do for me.
She brought Jesus to me in a real, safe, warm and joyful way.

It didn’t matter what I wanted to do, I simply knew that when Joanne is ready, her path is ready.

We hope that this song will bring you comfort in knowing that Joanne is
"flying where she should".
All our love and prayers.

The Knoepfli's, Burke's and Snider's


Flying Home - Chantal Kreviazuk

Its hard to let you go
You've always let me in
And helped with all the endings
And you know where to begin
I need you here for me
Cause you always know my heart
I cant believe we'd change
Or have to be apart
But if you've seen the love that's in her eyes
Then everything is good
And if you know the way she felt inside
She's flying where she should
I never believed we'd ever live to see
An angel being born and flying home
Its good to know your laugh
And you'll always hold my hand
And watch from up in heaven
And always understand
We'll take you down the road
And in everything we do
We'll know how much you love us
A soul that's kind and true.
But if you've seen the love that's in her eyes
Then everything is good
And if you know the way she felt inside
She's flying where she should
I never believed we'd ever live to see
An angel being born and flying home

Dear Ted and Bev,

Thirty year ago a number of remarkable people came into our lives when we joined the Jaycees and Jaycettes. Over that time our dirty dozen have shared so much and now we share in your sorrow. I recounted that between the six couples we have 15 kids and we shared their joys and triumphs. Next came our children getting married starting with Mike and Joanne, who can forget that hot hot day and the father/daughter dance with Joanne and Del. Our children had children 19 to date and still counting and we all bragged about them. Along with the highs came the lows and the loss of grandparents and parents and our group once again supported each other.

You can once again count on our support in these most trying times, the loss of a child Joanne was like your daughter is hard to bear but she made such an impact not only with your son and his family but on the whole community. Her courage, and determination is to be admired, she even inspired you Bev to do something exordinary by walking 60 km. It's hard to understand why bad things happen to good people but we must remember Joanne as the strong, funny and vibrant women who touched all our hearts.

If there is anything we can do this week to help out please call.

All our love,

Doug and Dianne

For funeral announcement and details visit.

http://www.jsjonesandsonfuneralhome.com/notices.htm

Dear friends

It is so amazing what the love of family can do.. I am so impressed by all of you ... What a time you have had and what a wonderful woman Joanne has been. Mike be proud of yourself for your wonderful support and the way you have dealt with your kids ... you are awesome ... Kayy you are an amazing mother ... I will never forget the support you gave me at St. Francis when I returned to teaching.

I must pay a tribute to Kim. What a sister, sister in law and aunt you have been ... I know how close you are to Joanne ... You have been amazing as I know your heart broke for Mike and Joanne but what a wonderful blog you wrote and such a tribute to Kay that you toasted her and acknowledeged her love for Joanne and Mike ...

You are truly blessed and a very special family.

Love , prayers to all
Laurie and Art

Thank You Joanne

My visit to Joanne Sunday August 27th.

I had spent the morning being the best Aunt I could be to my now 10 year-old niece Katrina who lost her father, my brother, January 2005. It was Katrina's birthday and I was the master organizer hanging the piñata, pin the tail on the donkey and bobbing for pears fresh from Katrina's Grandma's tree! All I could think about was how I wanted to teach Katrina about life and love.

From there I went to visit Joanne. I walked into a busy room with Joanne in the centre, sat for a minute and Mike's Mom suggested I visit quickly before Joanne fell asleep. I went over to Joanne's bedside and the light coming from her bright eyes filled me with an absolute joy that is impossible to truly describe. Even though I was only in Joanne's life for a short time while we worked on the documentary together and I hadn't seen her for some time, Joanne knew me and filled my heart absolutely full, now brimming with love.

I thought I would react with great sadness to this visit, but rather Joanne taught me in this brief moment of intensely valuable time, to return the light she was emanating, it was an intensely insightful experience for me. Thank you Joanne.

I spent time with Mike and his family who accepted me so fully, and made me feel that I was part of their extended family. I witnessed the absolute love that surrounds this amazing woman Joanne, and can see how graceful, beautiful and dignified this experience can be.

Thank you Joanne, for showing me a glimpse of this love and light, I will forever pass this on with love, and thank you for giving me this gift I can teach to my niece Katrina.

Mike, Darcy, Dylan, Dean and Kay,
my heart goes out to you all.
Mary M. Frymire

[Note: - Mary is the director of the documentary 'Don't Stand Still' that Joanne was in]

Selected Quotes from
Elisabeth Kubler-Ross:

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity and an understanding of life that fills them with compassions, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.

If you live each day of your life right, then you have nothing to fear. Throughout life, we get clues that remind us of the direction we are supposed to be headed, if you stay focused, then you learn your lessons.

Those who learned to know death, rather than to fear and fight it, become our teachers about life.

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose ....

People are like stained-glass windows. They sparkle and shine when the sun is out, but when the darkness sets in, their true beauty is revealed only if there is a light from within.

There are no mistakes, no coincidences, all events are blessings given to us to learn from.

The ultimate lesson all of us have to learn is unconditional love, which includes not only others but ourselves as well.

We need to teach the next generation of children from day one that they are responsible for their lives. Mankind's greatest gift, also its greatest curse, is that we have free choice. We can make our choices built from love or from fear.

Should you shield the canyons from the windstorms, you would never see the beauty of their carvings.

Learn to get in touch with the silence within yourself and know that everything in this life has a purpose.